I Be Tryin to Think

 

But thinking them thoughts is so dang hard.

 

Sometimes I is so close to catchin one of them ideas…

 

…but then it just invaporates right into thin aer.

 

An I haves to start all over.

 

I’ve been thinking that this would be the very last post on Creative Devolution.  Its not that I don’t like doing it.  That IS the problem.  I love it.  I feel like maybe my blog is a very very selfish thing that I do all for me. All about me.  Me me me.

So I thought I’d have a little blog discussion here.  What are my reasons for this online journal?  Are there other reasons to do it other than big ugly self-centeredness?

 

Anyway, I thought I’d tell you how I’m thinking.  I would love to hear from you.  Even just a “It was fun while it lasted” comment would fill my little heart with unending happiness.  I sure would love to know who’s been reading.

Thank you friends.

I Am Experiencing Severe Technical Difficulties.

 

I have found myself in a situation that I never once, even in my darkest dreams, imagined I would be in.

In fact, my twisted mind never even CAME UP with this scenario.

 

Apparently it happens to my sister-in-law all the time.

 

And she has 5 KIDS! Not 2!

 

I don’t know how she has survived.

 

 

I’ve BARELY made it through the weekend.

 

I’ve just never considered what laryngitis does to a mother of toddlers….

 

Unfortunately, its not just laryngitis.  I took Siggy in for The Issues last week and by some point…don’t even remember which day….

…I had the pink-eye.  And then the fever.  And then the sore throat.  It went something like this….

 

By Saturday my voice was gone.  How do you handle life when you can’t scream at your children?  I had to resort to exaggerated looks.

 

 

The worst is that one where  you try to convey how incredulous you are and it requires your chin(s) to slide back into your neck….

 

And The Emotion Charades….

 

 

Boy are those ineffective.

 

By Monday morning I had become this big, stupid gorilla. Lumping around, sniffing things and grunting at my offspring.

 

On Sunday I took some drugs and got out long enough to watch my kids put plastic orbs in portable containers.

 

But the rest of the week has been me sleeping in the crib with Boy…

 

Or the recovered child all up in my grill at the plumbers crack of dawn….

 

I wish I could say that I was feeling better but let me tell you, these antibiotics should be fired.  Jerks.

Mar 27, 2013 - Poop and/or Barf    19 Comments

I’m ’bout to Bust a Cap!

Excuse me while I rant.  This isn’t just a rant, this is a Rantasaurus Rex.

 

 

I’ve been taking my kids to the same Children’s Medical place since we arrived in the States.  I REALLY like the doctors.  But the nurses are horrid.  Last year I took Siggy in for one illness or another.  He was going through a little panic-phase so I wasn’t super-stoked about taking him in.  But he had a fever and bla bla bla.

So we got The Nurse.  She is young.  Under 25.  And you could tell by looking at her face that she loathed having to deal with children.

Dude, I get it!   I don’t like kids either.  AND THAT’S WHY I’M NOT A NURSE IN A PEDIATRICIANS OFFICE.

 

 

 

It was cold in there and Siggy was already a little shaky. I knew by the time we got to the scale, that he was going to lose it if I tried to put him down.

 

 

She wanted to bludgeon me with her clip-board.

 

 

 

 

It wasn’t so much that she was all about procedure, she was just going to show this little brat that he needed to grow up right then and there.

And so she clamped down on him and forced him to sit on that scale.

 

I was shocked at the sheer anger on her face.  It would have been different if she was some old squishy granny nurse who was all…

 

But she wasn’t.  She was physically taking out her frustrations on a kid.

Aaaaaand then he started flipping out…..

 

…which led to the yakking…..

 

 

You have never seen a nurse angrier than she was right then.

 

But she wasn’t nearly as angry as I was….

 

 

So then yesterday Siegfried woke up with a fever and lots of crying. I got him in to the doctor as soon as I could.  Took him in his jammies with a big fat blanky.

He did a lot of squirming….

 

Which is not a good sign if you’re hoping to avoid barf.

Anyway, they called us back and we sat in the tiny waiting room.

 

And sure enough, during the 47 million years that we had to wait, Siggy puked.

All. Over. The. Place.

 

I finally got him to the trash can and then set him up against the wall while I went all nuts with the paper-towels. Scrubbed everything down.

 

And finally the doctor came in, figured out his problem, etc etc.  She saw his nasty blanky on the floor, drenched in yak, and said she would have the nurse bring me a trash bag to carry it out in.

We waited for another 47 million years and the new nurse finally showed up with a tiny little doggy-poop bag.

 

She left again, and when Siggy finally turned 5 she came back. With nothing.

 

Her passive-aggressive apathy was enough to make me break out in hives.

Really girlfriend?  You made it through nursing school but you can’t figure out how to acquire a trash bag in an office that produces an awful lot of waste?

 

 

UNBELIEVABLE!!!

I AM A MAJICAL BEAST… FAIRY….UNIBEASTICORN FAIRY….

I don’t know why I don’t talk about my work that much on here.  I’ve shown a few pics of the boutiques I do display for.  Such cute stores!

Its just that I work late at night or early in the morning, when they’re closed.  There is some overlap though, and the employees know me as the ragged girl who hangs things on their walls and makes them all slightly uncomfortable.

 

And, well, I’m okay with that.

I worked on Thursday night this week.  It was HOT. And I was so tired and slightly hormonal.So I ripped that place to shreds.  Moved stuff around. Hung things.  Wielded my magical powers.

 

And then entire time I worked, I had an audience.  There is an ice-cream parlor next door so I get a lot of Looky-Lou’s.  A kid’s b-day party.  An old couple.  A bunch of obnoxious 14-year-old boys.  But sometimes I have the Silent Starers…..

 

And they get under Our skin until We start talking to Ourselves,  my precious…….

I had this group on Thursday while I was trying to hang a large dusty shutter in a precarious place….

ta-da!

 

At some point I’d finally had enough! I was all….

 

And I marched over and grabbed me one of these bad boys.

They are INFLATABLE! How much awesomeness is that?!?!

 

I was ready to stick it to the man!

 

Read it and weep, people. Read it and weep.

 

 

 

 

 

……ok, so really I just wore it all night because I thought it would be fun, but then 3 hours into work it started making my head all sweaty because I was working under some chandeliers….

 

But a group of teenage boys DID tell me that it was awesome… which is a good indication that I’m doing something WRONG with my life.

 

On Friday, my mother-in-law, Honey, came over and let me hide in the bedroom and start a new painting.  YAY FOR ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

And so I did….

 

And then later Cathy texted me to tell me she was going to Fredericksburg and I’m glommed onto her.

 

And so we went and had dinner with sweet Rose and then they watched a movie in Rose’s room and I set up my paints.

 

And then the next morning they went and got breakfast burritos and I stayed home and dug around in the china cabinet until I found a receptacle (HOLY COW I JUST GOT MY SPELL CHECK TO WORK) that was an acceptable size for the amount of coffee I wished to consume.

and I found this GREAT bowl…..

And then we stuffed burritos in our face.

Anything else you want to know?

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