There is a reason I haven’t posted more this week.

But if I tell you, you’ll all know think I’m crazy.

This project has pushed me over the edge.

I made me a chair!  

I took a dead chair and glued some leather and some velvet and some fabric on it and then attached it to a bolt of lighting.

!!!

Now it is my pretty pretty chair.  And I am suffering from chair-creating exhaustion.

I will retreat into my Pretty Pretty until next week…

Until then?

BEHOLD!  MY CREATION!!!!

…..so much of the pretty…..

Why on earth did I ever think I could keep a blog going at this time in my life?  Where did this COME from???

The Dark Knight and I have been married for almost 17 YEARS!  Thats enough time to write The Twilight series (in 400 different languages).  All those free evenings!  What did I do back when I could do and eat whatever I wanted??

(We didn’t dance. We are so NOT dancers)

Even after just one kid I had a little of the spunk left.

(This photo was taken by Amy-Rose King at a photo-shoot with Ashley Rogers.  You should look at their stuff and be wowed!!!!)

But now…..I’ve had two kids.  And they are at the age that kills my brain cells.  Its the little things that break a person down.

The unsolicited announcements…..

The unseen altercations…

Boy’s habit of clocking me in the face with absolutely anything and everything he wants me to see or do.

Its a form of torture that should be illegal.  Especially when I’m holding him.

But there are a FEW moments that make it all cool.

Cool-ish…

No, really I think everything they do smells like rainbows.  They are PERFECT.  

Once again I’m linking up with other bloggers at Yeahwrite.me

Read. Vote.

This week has been so crazy that I can hardly keep up with my phone.  THATS saying something.  And Lynn is out of town so I’ve been moping about that.

I haven’t had time to draw.   So here are a few lame pics to distract you from my shortcomings (or to highlight them. Whichever)

We went to a wedding party on a ranch last Saturday night.  It was fabulous.  Siegfried and Boy cleaned a dirty camper  using an entire package of my wet wipes.  Fun for them, I guess…

Boy has allergies and thus spends his crabby hours walking around with his blankie stuffed in his mouth.

Also I’m still doing the projects.

I dyed these lamps red.

….and the counter top.  And both my hands. And several of Siegfried’s socks….

And I’m moving everything on my walls around.  This picture of Siegfried and I?

Its been EVERYWHERE.  On EVERY WALL.

Now its in the bedroom.

But what I’ve spent most of my time and energy doing this week is moping about The Wump.

We got a letter from the HOA here saying that he was a total lard-butt way over the weight limit and we had to get rid of him immediately.

First I was all…

Which immediately turned to….

And now its….

We couldn’t find anyone who would take him.  So I started calling rescues and shelters. Full, full, full. Overflowing, in fact.

For a second there I thought we might have to put him to sleep.  But then family came to our rescue and agreed to take him.  Thank you, family.

We’ve had him for 7 years. He’s been EVERYWHERE, man!  He’s even been to the French Quarter in New Orleans.  I haven’t even been to New Orleans.

Anyway, yet another ode to my dog.

Before I had babies, he was my baby.

(Wow. Look at the size of my feet.  Remind me never to wear flip flops with skinny jeans….)

But then I had Siegfried while in Africa and I had to explain to the Wump that he was now playing second fiddle.

Poor, poor sweet Wumpy.

His fur drives me nuts.  And his constant skittering around in the kitchen.  But I still love him.

My lazy freak-of-nature…..

My 3-year-old, Siegfried, has picked up quite a number of phrases  that I overuse.  Some of them are ridiculous.  But he knows how to use the proper ones to his advantage.

I’ve been waiting for the day when Boy, the 1-and-a-half-year-old, will start wowing me with my own vocabulary.

He’s just SO TINY.

And fairly quiet.

But lately he’s been busting out the words.  My words.

And to my horror……. he has A TWANG. 

Wha??? Do I STILL  have A TWANG????

I thought I eliminated that nasty thing, but it must still be in there somewhere. Muddying the already murky waters of my speech.

It started with the word “Painting”.

My paintings are hanging all over the house for a lack of anywhere better to put them.  Boy has created his own hickish word for them and everyday he walks around pointing them out.

What have I done???

Apparently I use the phrase “Aw, man!” all the time.  He does too.  And he uses it correctly.  As a form of empathy. Only, he sounds like he should be sitting on the porch with a banjo.

Oh my poor, sweet boy.  I apologize in advance. Mommy loves you.

PS- I would have continued drawing but my husband brought home the first book of The Hunger Games last night (which I read in its entirety) and if I don’t download the second one right now my head will implode.

Until I resurface, go chek out some great bloggers at yeahwrite.me

Vote!

I hate emoticons.

They are so….generic.

And…..understated.

They’re all, “Tee-hee” and “whoopsies!” and “Have a great summer don’t ever change!”

I don’t even know if I can draw myself with an emoticon sentiment.

LETS TRY, shall we??

That, to me, means something like…..

And its makes me feel aggressive in my thoughts.

I text a lot.  Its how I communicate.  I’d rather eat my weight in dirt than talk on the phone.  But how do I express myself with such inadequate emoticons.

WHO AM I?

WHAT ARE MY THOUGHTS AND FEELINGS?

WHAT IS IT, EXACTLY, THAT I’M TRYING TO CONVEY IN LIFE? (or texts. Whichever)

Well, for starters its NEVER a fluffy little smiley face.  If its happy, its really happy.

More often than not, there are subtle variations on my mood.

Take for instance, Too Stupid to Live.

It could cover multiple circumstances that come up often in my life.

Or…

And then, in a slightly different hue, is Stupid, Obnoxious Idiot.

You know the one….

Really, so many possibilities with this guy.

Another Stupid option would be….

Too Stupid To Speak.

But there are other regularly occurring feelings that I would love to portray.

Without words.

I am all of these things on a daily basis.

Maybe I need to up my meds.

PS- Feel free to take any of these “emoticons” for your own personal use.  I left room above most of them for word bubbles….