Too Stupid To Live 
15 Comments I probably think this song is about me, don’t I? Don’t I?
I’m. So. Vain.
Or really, I’m a girl.
It comes with the territory.
I used to be fairly well groomed. But when we moved overseas I decided I was going to stop dying my hair. Yikes!
I succeeded too! Until I got a few “violet” streaks in my hair this past year, I haven’t dyed it at all. Lets see if I have a picture……
A blurry bathroom shot. Lucky you.
Anyway, on Friday I got hit with a sudden urge to groom myself. Its been a while. Its like I came out of the fog of winter…
*Like we even HAVE a winter...
…and suddenly noticed that I was in a bad state of disrepair. I could be condemned any minute now. I think it was the moment I took my scarf off and looked in the mirror. Wow.
Scary.
I was looking like “Oprah Without Makeup”. You know about that. Don’t act like you don’t!
One minute she’s all…
That looks nothing like her but you know what I mean.
And then, like an hour after taping, she’s all…
Don’t freak out. I’m not knocking the Oaps. I have the same thing going on. Me without makeup is scary.
Except put on some makeup.
Which I decided to do.
And it wasn’t just my face that needed attention.
Dang! That is truly frightening. Look at the size of those fingers! You think I exaggerate?
Hang on I’m gonna go take a picture of my hand….
Bam!
Those are some long phalanges! And no, my skin isn’t THAT blotchy. It was dark and my phone takes grainy shots…..
Man, I should have photoshopped that out…
Anyway, on Friday night I slunk into Walgreens….
I’m starting from scratch here, so I just grabbed a few things and sped back home.
I laid the items out on my vanity.
Yeah right.
Like I have a vanity.
I dumped them on the floor.
Wow. So much money for little tiny things.
I looked them over and then put them away hastily. I can’t have my makeup out with the little people around.
But the next morning I decided to PRIMP!
I plucked three eyebrow hairs!
I took a long bath!
Then I dried my hair and put on some MAKEUP!!!
I felt like 47 million bucks!
Then I walked into a livingroom full of guys.
The first guy wanted to be picked up.
The second guy freaked out over the sight of hair.
Ruint!! 
Its a good thing my scarf makes me so happy….
Tee-hee, the winter fog pic, at first glance, looks like you’re rocking a fu manchu mustache.
I WAS! I just had it waxed before the rest of the drawings….
You should post a video of that cool finger dance you do with your two index fingers.
If only it didn’t use up so many calories!
Haha! So funny! Love the drawing of your toenails as you clomped through the store too!
By the way, this morning I was making tea and couldn’t find my strainer. As I stood there in total frustration – the sentence, “Where’s MINE strainer!!???” screamed through my head! It made me do a double take and I burst out laughing!
Thats funny! Its such a great way to express “Mine frustration!”
That, my friend is why I don’t bother. (Except for weddings and things, and then I have a strict policy of not picking up any children until at least after the pictures. )
Handling toddlers is dangerous when there is anything pretty on or near your face. Makeup. Hair. Jewelry. Thats why we look the way we do…..
Oh my goodness, this post made me laugh so hard, tears came out of my eyes.
‘Put ler scarf on Mommy!’
I have Getting Old Face Lotion too, geez is that stuff pricey:)
Still trying to decide if its working……
And that is why I wear a messy bun and pajamas all day. Feeling human doesn’t last long around little humans.
Yes!!! Those violet streaks look plum perfect!
I love your words for things! My favorite so far is “Boing-Boings!” I am also saying “Nom, nom, nom” in my head when I eat yummy things.
Bahaha! Laughed out loud at the last few frames. This is why it’s really only worth primping before going out on a girl lunch. They’re the only ones who’ll actually appreciate it.
This is nearly my life. My boy hates when I wear headbands or ponytail holders. He also threw a tantrum which included scratching my neck and pulling 3 minutes after the stylist was done. Let’s not even discuss earrings.
BTW – I also have the long fingers!
HILARITY!