Like I’ve mentioned recently, I’ve been going through a depression of sorts. Like over the last 2 years. Its a lot of things. Stress. Hormones. Change.
It comes in waves. Monthly ones…
I’ve been trying to decide if its mostly chemical or if there are situational issues (yes that’s a word Spellcheck!).
Oh wait, maybe its circumstantial.
Yes, yes it is. I’m sorry spellcheck. Forgivsies?
Although I tend to keep to myself, I really am a social person in that I like a few good friends. People DO actually interest me.
But then there is always the “saying things out-loud” aspect of it….
Spellcheck, you are absolutely no help in this area. I’m not sure this relationship is going to work out….
I’ve thought a lot about my mothering doubts. Does anyone else ever feel like the worst mother on the planet? I’ve wanted kids for a long long long time. And now that they are here, I would die a million deaths for them. But does that mean I want to be with them 24/7? No. It does not.
Am I a bad mother? ….Spellcheck?
Sometimes I find myself strongly desiring things i cannot have…
Is the depression a contentment issue? I don’t think so.
But I went to a counselor a couple of weeks ago just to give it a try. She was a very sweet woman but too practical for my illogical mind. She liked to “boil things down to the basics”.
I’m not about the basics. I’m about the intricacies.
The basics are funny to me….
But really, I’m doing ok. Working out. Taking some meds. Thinking happy thoughts.
Throwing myself into my daily activities.
Like taking my offspring to the park….
…and the dollar store…..
Taking “selfies” with my phone…
Attacking projects with intense fervor…
Have I told you about my headbands?
I occasionally design for a company called Johnny Loves Rosie. The owner had her business in London for years and now things are happening in the States. I am designing for her. Here are a few I did for last fall…
Anybody want to sell these in their boutiques? This fall will be very cool.