The Dark Knight and I married when I was 21 and he was 19.

We were so young.  So young that we didn’t  really plan much of a wedding. Got married on Christmas Eve.  The Dark Knight couldn’t drive a stick shift yet so after the reception we (I) drove off and we went through the drive through of Taco Bell.  Me still in my Grandmother’s wedding dress and he in his borrowed tuxedo.

It was a little weird…..

Anyway, after that we moved to San Antonio for a few years.  During that time, I decided that, man, I wanted some kids.

Of course it didn’t happen.  Like, EVER.

5 years later we moved to Chicago, and for a brief period of time I was distracted from the thought of babies.

Sort of…..

But then we hit that age where all of our friends started pumping out babies.  And I mean PUMPING THEM OUT!!!

I can’t even tell you how many baby showers I went to.

Some of them I threw myself.  I didn’t mind most of it.  It was the conversation that killed me. It always started out with one hospital story and then escalated.

Don’t get me wrong, if I’d had a story to tell I would have been blathering on with the rest of them.

But I didn’t.  And now I was the oldest and I had been married the longest.

About 10 years into our marriage I really, truly gave it up.  No more baby thoughts. No more urinating on sticks.  Nothing.  I just KNEW.  I knew it wasn’t going to happen and I was ok.  So we sold all our junk and moved to Africa.

At some point I flew back home for work.  When I returned I had THE WORST jet-lag.  I just couldn’t shake it.  On the morning of the 5th day home, I was pouring myself some coffee when the smell of it just about turned my face inside out.

For a brief second I had a tiny little thought.

And after 13 years of marriage, I urinated on a stick that produced a result I had not yet seen….

I probably stared at it for 5 minutes, trying to figure it out.

And then I realized that my whole world view was about to change.  And I ran!

We lived on the strawberry farm at that point and The Dark Knight was down the road at the farm stall.  I ran to find him.

When I found him, I announced in very uncertain terms, the situation.

And he understood me anyway and hugged me and said, “congratulations.”

And then I sat on the porch and happy-sobbed for like 30 minutes.

The Beginning.